A Juicy Squirt in the Eyeball

So I am one of these people who try to eat my 5 a day and love the odd apple, pear or carrot stick. But today I decided I fancied a change and opted for the lovely big orange in the  fruit bowl. But NEVER AGAIN!

Upon peeling the orange I was rudely squirted in the eyeball by projectile citrus juice.

Now this stings like a twat!  I was jumping about rubbing my eye wincing in pain and it is still all red and stingy an hour later.

So I have come to the conclusion that it is so difficult to keep up with the 5 a day lark when so many fruits and vegetables have a nasty nature. For example:

Oranges squirt you in the eye.

Lemons make your face look like your chewing a wasp.

Garlic always ruins that first date.

Sprouts ruin your sex life.

Onions make you look like your dog just died.

Beetroot makes you look like you have been on a murdering spree.

So I think these health people should consider the fact that, we just don’t have enough room in our handbags for safety goggles, breath freshener and rubber gloves.